another post: Church of the Comic Spirit

A Routine Five-Year Physical

He wandered into the office and checked in at the front desk. He had an appointment, he reminded them; he was there for his five-year physical.

A young nurse smiled at him sympathetically, gave him a form to fill out, and pointed him in the direction of the lounge. He shuffled over to the lounge, bumping into a potted plant on the way. He steadied himself in front of an armchair before sitting down. He squinted at the grid of boxes requesting vital facts about the patient. He sighed. This was the part he hated most, answering all the personal questions. But he had to do it. It was all part of the system.

Name: Enoch.
Age: 365.
Address: 7 Eden East Drive.
Occupation: early retiree.
Marital status: married, with children.
Spouse: Beth (“Ma”), age classified.
Eldest son: Methuselah, age 300.
Eldest grandson: Lamech, age 113.
Father: Jared, age 527.
Paternal grandfather: Mahalaleel, age 592.
Paternal great-grandfather: Cainan (a.k.a. Kenan), age 662.
Paternal great-great-grandfather: Enos, age 752.
Paternal great-great-great-grandfather: Seth, age 857.
Paternal great-great-great-great-grandpa: Adam, deceased (cause of death: homesickness).
Family tradition: righteous living.
Personal motto: “An apple a day.”