from The Church of the Comic Spirit

The wilderness. Day. Hagar is sitting on a rock beside a fountain, holding her tummy.

Narrator’s Voice:And an angel of the Lord found her by a fountain of water in the wilderness.

An angel descends from heaven with a briefcase. She trips lightly among the rocks and stands before Hagar.

Angel: (Dramatically) Hagar, former handmaid of one Sara, and close personal friend of one Abram, and before that, Miss Egypt and the third runner-up in the Miss Universe Pageant.

Hagar: And who, pray tell, might thou be?

​Angel: I am an angel of the Lord, sent to comfort and instruct thee in this, thine hour of trial.
Hagar:(Suspiciously) What’s it gonna cost me?
Angel:Fifty shekels an hour for the backrub and prenatal care, and that includes five minutes of legal advice.
Hagar:Anangel of the Lord, did you say? Not theangel of the Lord?
Angel:Right. But one of the top-ten angels, if I may blow mine own horn.