from September, 2006
In my last piece, I promised to continue the thread of thought that Paul Crutzen initiated with his suggestion that we prevent the coming Global Warming Holocaust (GWH) that threatens the Survival of Humankind (SOH) by filling the stratosphere with particles of sulphur (S), using high-altitude balloons or powerful artillery shells.
We at MJTT lengthened that thread with the counter-suggestion that a better, less expensive method, be used: set off, at our pleasure, volcanic eruptions. Our thinking is that if Pinatubo’s eruption could cool planet earth (PE) after 1991, there is every reason to suppose that Pintatubo’s fellow volcanoes could pull the trick at our pleasure. In brief, we should go with the proven system.
MJTT has spent the month of August discussing the precise method that could, and should, be employed. We began with the observation that there are many unused atom and/or hydrogen bombs at hand, still pointed, we have reason to believe, at the former Soviet Union (FSU). Why not put these Cold War relics to good use by pointing them at the base of a vulnerable volcano, thus causing an eruption that could do the work of thousands of balloons, and in a more cost-effective way? (We suggested, early in August, that MJTT could perform this exacting task for $22.9 billion, though we could be encouraged to lower our bid if other perks were to be added to the pot.)
Following hard upon this thought was another: why not choose our volcano so that it would erupt in such a way that it would break a drought, as Pinatubo purportedly did several years after its eruption, causing the Mississippi River to overflow its banks from Iowa on down?
Though the details have not yet been worked out (details such as distance, upper-wind currents, drought area, etc.), we propose that Mount Rainier be the target volcano (TV) and that the beneficiary of its eruption be the arid region from Las Vegas west to the Sierras, including Death Valley, which would make a remarkable reservoir not only for industrial use but for boating, water skiing, snorkeling, and other sports.
We are quick to counter the objections of those who climb the aforementioned volcano every summer: first, there is a lengthy string of lovely, challenging volcanoes running from Baker to Lassen; second, one of the unintended consequences of filling the stratosphere with S, according to Mr. Crutzen, is the plethora of spectacular sunrises and sunsets such action would trigger.